Signs & portents: January 2014 – Virgo

24 August – 22 September

MEN

You will begin to feel a little better about yourself in January, predict the fates, right up until the epidural wears off.

WOMEN

Your decision, in January, to spend your Winter vacation at work to deal with your enormous backlog, will sit uneasily with some – & your beach-ball & sun-lounger will frankly look out of place in the courtroom.

WIT & WISDOM

Swimming with dolphins, running with the bulls, or better yet, happy hour with the Brazilian ladies volleyball team.

This machine is only partly operational – it will accept coins.

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