Signs & portents: August 2014 – Cancer

22 June - 23 July

22 June – 23 July

MEN

The fates say that in August you should try to keep a low profile, at least until the police manage to track down the sniper that your wife hired.

WOMEN

In August the fates say that you will find a degree of peace & comfort in a renowned, but isolated, beauty spot hidden deep in the woods; but only until you hear the barking of the tracker dogs & the crackle of the police radios.

WIT & WISDOM

Listening to a parrot is unlikely to provide you with any useful advice or guidance.

Buy now & avoid the rush.

Buy now & avoid the rush.

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3 thoughts on “Signs & portents: August 2014 – Cancer

      • It’s got everything. All the fun stuff. Even a talking parrot. Tell me, the parrot dobbed her in to the cops, right? The above, about the unlikeliness of hearing anything useful from a parrot, is a foil so her family won’t take him to the taxidermist.

        I’ve got the plot all worked out. The parrot flies South for Winter and lives on the reward money and crackers.

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