View from a Rhino House: one for the birds

In Turkey, this weekend, authorities detained a bird on suspicion it was spying for Israel, & it was only freed after X-rays showed it was not embedded with surveillance equipment or weapons, an Istanbul newspaper reported on Friday.

The bird, a kestrel, gave rise to suspicion over its visit to Turkey because of a metal ring on its foot carrying the words “24311 Tel Avivunia Israel”, & residents in the village of Altinayva handed it over to the local authorities believing it to be a “Zionist agent or saboteur” .

The bird was X-rayed at the provincial university hospital to check for explosives, microchips & bugging devices, according to the newspaper story, which carried a front-page image of the X-ray pictures with the title “Israeli agent”.

The relationship between Turkey & Israel, who were for a long time on passably good terms (Israel’s only Moslem “friendly state”), have been tense since the election of an Islamist-led government & an incident 3 years ago when Israeli commandos inadvertently killed 9 Turkish activists aboard the Mavi Marmara, a ship (loaded with vicious “dual usage” building materials, concrete & piping) in a Turkish-led convoy seeking to break a naval blockade of the Gaza Strip. The Israeli government has “regretted” the deaths but insists that being armed with hoses, cutlery & a fire axe made the activists a serious threat to the highly-trained military force & hence “valid targets.”

No wonder bird watchers are called twitchers!

Turkish bird watchers prepare for more visitors from Israel.

Sign of the times

Bastard!

View from a Rhino House: the sweet smell of success

Sales of an orange-scented perfume sold in Gaza have rocketed since it was re-named in honor of the missiles that Palestinians shot at Israel during their disagreement in November, the manufacturer said.

“M-75” cologne, which comes in men’s & women’s versions, is named for the missiles shot at Tel Aviv & Jerusalem during the week-long disturbances.

As always both sides proclaimed a significant victory, Israel said it had halted rocket fire at its towns, while in Gaza the less generous in spirit were taking pride in having shot a rocket as far as Tel Aviv, the longest-range rocket strike by the Palestinians so far.

“I hope the smell is strong enough for them to whiff in Tel Aviv & remind the Jews of the Palestinian victory,” (sic) Ahmed Hassan, a customer visiting from neighboring Egypt, said as he bought 30 bottles of the perfume as souvenirs in a Gaza City shop. He seemed unconcerned by the >180 Palestinian dead or the 6 Israelis who also died for no apparent reason that can explained to the saner members of the species. He also didn’t seem to be to worried about how he smelled.

Rajaey Odwan, director of Gaza’s Continental Style perfume company which sells mainly local knockoffs of famous European fragrances, said he thought he’d give customers a chance to smell victory & “turn it into a perfume”. It’s not clear if Hamas were actually firing orange-scented missiles or this was just an egregious piece of opportunistic marketing.

He has been selling the 60 ml black-&-green bottles made of orange, lemon & other herbal scents collected in Gaza, for about $13 apiece.

“Sales have gone through the roof,” he said, apparently without any attempt at irony.

Nice to see the seasonal trade is picking-up.

“Maybe we could do a blood-colored version next…..”

Xmas wish list #6

This years top toy in Iran, Israel & all points east….

View from a Rhino House: beastly worries in Gaza

A crocodile allegedly on the run from a Gaza zoo for more than a year has finally been captured, police said earlier today. An Israeli defense spokeswoman said that it was “too soon” to say if this would result in tomorrow’s planned air force strikes against Iranian nuclear facilities being cancelled.

The 1.8 metre-long reptile was spotted several weeks ago in sewage pools in the northern Gaza Strip, & villagers complained it had been eating their livestock. Police called in fishermen, who promptly, & apparently without difficulty, netted the crocodile, adding some credibility to Israeli claims that it was in fact a prototype nuclear-armed crocodile, being prepared to launch a deadly terrorist strike against amphibian-loving Israeli school children.

“He’s a beautiful troublemaker,” police spokesman Ayman al-Batniji said. “We really sweated to take him alive.”

“This is another blatant example of Iranian attempts to destroy Israel with illegal nuclear animals,” said the Israeli spokeswoman.

The escapee was returned to the zoo & reunited with four other crocodiles donated by the government in Tehran. Owners of the zoo said the crocodile had grown considerably since his escape, & they had decided to name him “Sakher”, or Rock, as a tribute to his survival. His original name it seems translated as “Death-to-the-Zionists” in an obscure farsi dialect.

Tourism at the shit ponds had certainly fallen-off since Sakher had moved in.