Dear Agony Aunts
My husband has said that this year we should not bother with giving each other Christmas gifts; he says Christmas is only for the kids, & now that they have grown-up & flown the nest we should economize to ensure we can have a comfortable old age.
Although I wasn’t keen on a “no gifts” Christmas I could see the sense in what he said, right up to the point where he just bought himself yet another model train set. When I asked him about economizing he said that it was “an investment” & that he was only thinking of our future. Since he’s been playing with it non-stop for the last 2 weeks I think that his justification is what we call round here, “a load of old bollocks.”
How can I make sure he appreciates the depths of my dissatisfaction & at the same time enjoy a more festive Yuletide?
“Noël”
Dear “Noël”
Assuming you don’t just want to “off” the old miser we’d suggest selling his train sets on eBay & blowing the cash on a Christmas cruise. Explain that you would like to take him along but that in the interests of “economizing” you were only able to get a single ticket. If he makes too much of a fuss send us another e-mail; we have lots of ideas on how to get him “onside” – many of them involving electric cattle prods & domestic accidents.
Send us a card from somewhere nice.
Aunts.
ThursdayAgain 
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