People with issues #212

With advancing years Jake & Chloe had found that the garden had really got beyond them. Chloe was still a dab hand, though, at cleaning out the crocodile pond.

Caring & sharing #156

Dear Agony Aunts

Our new neighbors have a small puppy which keeps breaking into our garden & digging up my vegetable patch. My husband has spoken to them & they keep promising it won’t happen again, but this morning I woke up to find my prize vegetable bed completely ruined.

My husband says that we’ll just have to put up with it but it’s not his hopes for the village fete that have been trampled!

What’s the best way to prevent the mutt from spoiling my little hobby & how can I get my husband to be a little more energetic in defending my interests?

“Rosie”

 

Dear “Rosie”

We suggest that burying a live electric mesh will provide a small surprise for the puppy that will either cause him to avoid your garden like the plague in future, or will actually fry him into an amusingly shaped piece of charred carbon – either way it’s “problem solved”.

Motivating hubby could be a little more difficult (unless you can get him to dig the same vegetable patch) & we often recommend the purchase an electric cattle prod as a useful aid in motivational training. A few touches when he is a little slow to act on your behalf should have him leaping about like a live wire whenever he thinks you are being in any way demeaned.

Enjoy.

Aunts

Love can be no tougher….

People with issues #173

Pete’s love for his small garden was legendary, wherever hairdressers gathered….

The divorce #12

“My love is a red, red rose……”