As I have always understood it, from Hammurabi and Solon onwards, the purpose of “Law” was to protect the weak against the strong and the poor against the rich. I wonder what went wrong…
Tag: law
View from a Rhino House: fashionistas vs fashion victims
In returning to a measure of sanity the city of Ocala (in Florida) has joined most of the developed world in deciding that “saggy pants” are a (dubious) fashion choice rather than a matter for the police, rescinding a two-month-old ban that threatened a criminal record for citizens “intentionally exposing their underwear or buttocks”.
“Putting someone in jail for 60 days and fining them $500 for wearing their pants two inches below their natural waistline, wherever that is, that’s not smart justice,” said Kent Guinn, mayor of Ocala; a sentiment that some might argue was valid back in July when the ordinance was passed. It’s worth noting, in passing, that the number of arrests, police cautions & complaints from members of the public during the 2 months that the city’s very survival was threatened by hordes of saggy-panted radicals came to exactly 0, in every category.
The Ocala ordinance banned saggy pants on city property, including streets, sidewalks, parks, public pools & municipal buildings. But critics accused city officials of racial discrimination & potentially violating constitutional free speech (nobody seemed to care how much money the good citizens had pissed-away making the Ocala streets safe from persons of doubtful taste in the trouser department).
“I don’t think government should be in the business of legislating how people are dressed,” city spokeswoman Jeannine Robbins said. “We’ve got here in Ocala a lot of things the police department should be dealing with other than that.”
Mary Rich, a city councillor who had campaigned for the law for six years, calling it a matter of public decency, voted against its repeal. “You wouldn’t want your mother coming to an affair downtown at the square & having people with their pants down to their knees,” Rich said in a statement to the world’s media when the law was passed; although she has yet to issue a statement concerning its abrogation.
She’s probably hiding in a bunker & praying the rapture takes her before the saggy-trouser brigade break down the door & drag her off to sartorial damnation.
Planned parenthood
In Ohio an appeals court has upheld a judge’s order that a man behind with his child support payments can’t have more kids until he pays the overdue amount in full.
The decision earlier this week didn’t provide an opinion about whether the judge’s order was appropriate. Instead the appeals court said it didn’t have enough information to decide the merits of the case without a copy of the pre-sentence report detailing Asim Taylor’s background.
In January 2013, a Lorain County Probate Judge said Taylor couldn’t have more children while he is on probation for five years. The judge said the order would be lifted if Taylor pays nearly $100,000 in overdue support for his four children.
I’d love to know how they’re going to enforce that one…..
View from a Rhino House: tooled-up
In the “land-of-the-free” a man accused of texting an unsolicited picture of his tattooed penis to a woman did not commit a crime under Georgia state law, the state’s Supreme Court ruled yesterday.
Chuck Warren faced being banged-up for 3 years after being indicted under a 1970’s Georgia law that makes it illegal to send unsolicited nude photographs by mail without a proper warning on the outside of the envelope. (Wouldn’t you just love to see an envelope that is legal?)
Lawyers claimed he texted the picture of his tattooed penis in October 2012 to a woman who then complained to police. According to prosecutors, Warren’s genitals were tattooed with the phrase, “STRONG E nuf 4 A MAN BUT Made 4 A WOMAN.” (So not great at spelling in addition to a fairly dubious choice of hobby – but the real question, on everybody’s lips, is – what font size?)
The Georgia Supreme Court said the state law did not cover photos “sent electronically through a cell phone text message, “ & the judges dismissed the criminal charge in a unanimous, if smirking, decision.
The defendant’s attorney also challenged the existing law on the ground that it violated his client’s First Amendment guarantee of free speech (the Founding Fathers must be turning in their graves), but the court did not address that constitutional minefield. Now if he’d had the Declaration of Independence tattooed there he’d pretty much be a shoe-in for the mid-term elections with his own You Tube channel.
View from a Rhino House: the other wailing wall
In the US an El Paso man faces 2 years in jail after pleading guilty to pissing against walls of the Alamo, the Disneyesque ruin seen by many as the symbol of Texas.
Daniel Athens pleaded guilty in a San Antonio court on Tuesday to the “Criminal Mischief of a Public Monument or Place of Human Burial,” which carries a punishment of up to 2 years in prison in the US’ most jail-happy state.
Athens was arrested almost 2 years ago after an “Alamo Ranger,” one of the law officers who guard the state’s No. 1 tourist attraction, saw him relieve himself on the wall of the 260-year-old building.
As part of a defence-proposed plea deal Athens will have to pay $4,000 to repair any damage he caused. (Either that was one terribly built wall or this man has a serious kidney & bladder problem – $4000 damage from a single stream of urine? – Santa Anna could have saved a lot of time by hiring this guy’s ancestor)
The Alamo has suffered its share of urinary insults down the years, the most famous was from chemically-challenged British rocker Ozzy Osbourne, who in 1982 urinated on the Cenotaph, for no reason that he could coherently explain, then or later.
View from a Rhino House: driven to distraction
In Saudi Arabian (where else?) a well-respected cleric (& amateur gynecologist) has said women who drive risk damaging their ovaries & may give birth to children with serious developmental & physical difficulties.
A web campaign calling for women to defy the Kingdoms, current legal ban on women driving that has organized a protest drive on 26th October has gone viral over the past week & won support from some prominent women activists. Yesterday access to the campaign’s website was blocked for those inside the Kingdom.
In an interview published before the weekend Sheikh Saleh bin Saad al-Lohaidan said women aiming to overturn the law on women driving should put “reason ahead of their hearts, emotions & passions”.
Saleh is a judicial adviser to an association of Gulf psychologists.
“If a woman drives a car, not out of pure necessity, that could have negative physiological impacts as functional & physiological medical studies show that it automatically affects the ovaries & pushes the pelvis upwards,” he said. “That is why we find those who regularly drive have children with clinical problems of varying degrees.”
He did not cite specific medical studies to support his arguments (probably an oversight).
The ban on women driving is not backed by a specific law, but only men are granted driving licenses. Women are usually fined for driving without a license but have also been detained & put on trial in the past.
Sheikh Abdulatif Al al-Sheikh, the head of the Saudi morality police, told reporters a few days ago that he was not aware of anything in the documents making up Sharia law, that barred women from driving.
King Abdullah has introduced some cautious reforms aimed at expanding women’s rights in Saudi Arabia, but he has not addressed the issue of driving.
View from a Rhino House: sex & sensibility
In the United States those looking to add a certain frisson to their sex lives will have to do so with less, after a US trade panel yesterday ruled that local suppliers are violating a patent held by a Canadian company for a “two-armed vibrator.”
The International Trade Commission (ITC) found that Lelo Shanghai Trading (LST) & others have infringed Standard Innovation Corp’s patent for a “two-armed vibrator” that couples can use during intercourse (don’t ask).
Standard Innovation, which is based in Ottawa, filed an infringement complaint against LST & others in Spring last year, accusing them of infringing on Standard’s patent for the adult toy, designed to be “worn” (again, just don’t ask) while a couple has sex.
On its website Standard Innovation describes the “We-Vibe” family of sex aids as “a global sensation.”
The commission’s ruling reverses a preliminary finding, by an ITC judge, who decided earlier this year that, while the products of LST & others did infringe on Standard Innovation’s patent, the patent holder did not have enough commercial activity in the United States to have “standing” to prevail at the ITC.
The full commission, unusually, disagreed with the preliminary findings of the judge & banned the US sale of vibrators made by Lelo Inc & a host of other small Asian manufacturers.
A patents case that doesn’t involve Apple or Samsung? Is the “two-armed vibrator” going to be the next iPad-type must-have for the hipster set? Do they come in different colors & sizes? Where does the second arm go? If you really want to know the answer to these, & a host of other, related questions; you are definitely reading the wrong blog. Try sitting alone in a darkened room & think about lettuce until the shaking stops.
View from a Rhino House: Ass-ing about
In Brussels the Belgian police have demanded that Lola, a theatrical donkey, be removed from the balcony of a cultural centre the city, after neighbors complained about her loud braying.
Lola is hanging-out on a first-floor balcony while she performs in a play at the Arab Cultural Centre, located in the same building. Staff had laid out straw and a bucket of water so she could get some fresh air when not performing.
Police have ordered Lola’s keeper to move her inside after receiving complaints about the donkey making too much noise.
Lola was still outside on Friday, and the (extremely pissed)-off) Director of the cultural center was angrily berating her neighbors for interfering.
“I say to the neighbors, well done! Why does it matter to you?” Hawa Djabili shouted at passersby. Asked why the donkey was still outside, she replied Lola “needed to breathe.” (So nothing to do with the rugs then…..)
The Brussels police said they planned to return with animal welfare officers to remove Lola if the centre did not comply with the order to keep the donkey indoors.
The animal is appearing in a play called “The Palestinian” at the Arab Cultural Center that runs until this evening.
…. and they say “the law is an ass,” In Belgium it’s all just so much bigger then they could have dreamed.
View from a Rhino House: the Vietnam war (reprise)
At the weekend in Vietnam, a fish farmer who became a cult hero for fighting off an illegal eviction with homemade guns & mines, was jailed for attempted murder.
Doan Van Vuon, two of his brothers & a nephew, were given jail terms of 2 – 5 years for injuring 7 police & soldiers in Haiphong in January, State media reported. Two wives (it’s not clear whose) received suspended sentences of 15-18 months for “resisting officials”.
National television showed footage from the courtroom displaying the propane gas cylinders, electrical cables & steel pipes Vuon’s family army used for bombs & guns.
Almost as an aside, the authorities in Haiphong have admitted their eviction was unlawful & a number of (very) junior officials face trials beginning at the end of this week.
One of the defense lawyers in the trial, claimed Vuon had no intention of causing harm & had exercised “all legal means” (an interesting claim, because there are none) to protect his land before staging his more direct resistance.
Rapid economic growth, foreign investment & industrial expansion has made land (all of which is technically owned by the State & leased to its citizens on 20 years contracts) disproportionally valuable. This has encouraged the abuse of standard clauses in leases that allow land seizures for reasons of national security, defense, economic development, public interest & any other reason that often corrupt beaurocrats can dream-up.
Of course, had someone explain to Vuon that fish thrive best in water, rather than amongst the area of trees he had actually leased, the whole sorry incident could have been avoided (but I can’t wait to see a 70-year old Stallone play the lead in the movie…..)
View from a Rhino House: dangerous women
In the US a woman in New York state pleaded not guilty last week to multiple charges of child endangerment after other parents complained that she hired female strippers for her son’s 16th birthday party. If convicted, Judy Viger faces up to a year in jail.
Viger was arrested after the parents of 5 teenage partygoers saw Facebook pictures of the scantily clad dancers performing dance routines at the party last November.
“The parents of the children who attended had no idea that the adult female entertainers would be present & were shocked & stunned when they discovered what had occurred,” the Saratoga County district attorney, James A. Murphy, III, said (with a straight face) in a statement released at the time of Viger’s arrest.
“Pictures of the event & the dancers first surfaced in the media after they were posted to one of the attendees’ Facebook page,” Murphy said.
If convicted of any or all of the counts of “endangering the welfare of a child,” Viger faces a maximum of one year behind bars as any sentence would run concurrently since the counts stem from a single incident, according to a court spokesperson (she must be relieved to hear that, & of course it is always possible the strippers were armed, in which case it’s going to be hard to get an acquittal anyway).
For her son’s 17th birthday it is reported that she intends to give out fire-arms as party favors & will encourage at least 5 of the putative guests to go home & demonstrate to parents just how “un-endangered” they are by the event.
Way to go, mom!
ThursdayAgain 
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